Once there was a small mouse that was traveling from his home across the plain to his visit a friend for a few days. The mouse was always careful when traveling on the plains as he knew that great dangers lurked at every turn. He had awoken at sunrise that morning to start his travels.
After some time of traveling, the mouse came across a lion lying directly on the only path available. The massive lion was snoring loudly and seemed to be sound asleep. The usually timid mouse weighed his options in his head and made a daring decision. He would tiptoe around the lion in order to reach the other side and continue on his path. As the mouse crept in front of the lion, his tail grazed the lion's snout. This caused the Lion to snort, scaring the Mouse. The mouse scurried across the lion's snout in his hurry to escape the impending danger. The Lion, now being fully awakened, reached out his mighty paw and trapped the tiny mouse.
"Please do not harm me!" shrieked the Mouse. "If you grant me this one wish I promise to make it up to you!"
"To think a tiny creature like you could help me!" laughed the Lion heartily. "For making me laugh I shall let you go this time. Don’t let this happen again."
The Mouse hurriedly scurried and finally made it to his friend’s house shortly before dark. After a few days of fine food and drink the Mouse had mostly forgotten about his dangerous encounter with the Lion. As his friendly visit came to an end, the Mouse once again set off across the plains towards his home.
On the eve of the first night of traveling home the Mouse decided it was time to find camp for the evening. He came across a large camp with a large fire with multiple hunters surrounding it. As the Mouse, looked for a place close enough to the fire for warmth and a few scraps he came across a familiar foe. The Lion was trapped underneath a net!
“Fancy seeing you in a predicament such as this,” whispered the Mouse.
“These hunters caught me as I was napping! Now get me out of here!” exclaimed the Lion.
So the Mouse nibbled on the net until the Lion could free himself. The Lion and Mouse scurried off to a safe place.
“Thank you, Mouse. I thought I was never going to escape,” explained the Lion.
“Well my promise to repay you doesn’t seem so silly now does it?” questioned the Mouse.
With that, the Lion helped the Mouse climb onto his back and the Mouse rode in style back to his home. It had been quite an eventful couple of days for the Mouse!
The Mouse helping the Lion escape (Wikipedia Commons)
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Author's Note: This is a short story that is based upon the fable "The Lion and the Mouse". This story can be found in Aesop for Children, by Anonymous, illustrated by Milo Winter (1919). The story is about a mouse who accidentally wakes up a lion who is sleeping. The lion decides he will not ultimately kill the mouse after the mouse promises to repay the lion some day. The lion finds this to be such an amusing thought that he lets the mouse go. Some time later, the lion is trapped in a net and the mouse happens upon him. He chews the net until the lion is freed and thus makes good on his promise to repay him.
I decided to give the story a little more background to show why the mouse was traveling through the plains and how the lion came to be trapped. I thought this would be a good way to give the reader a greater appreciation for both the mouse and lion's situations. Also, with the added dialogue I thought the lion's amusement at thinking the mouse could ever help him would be better conveyed.
The image I selected was straight from the book where the story was found. It illustrates the moment of truth within the story where the lion finds out that indeed the mouse could be a helpful friend in times of need.
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ReplyDeleteWhoops, copy and paste mishap! Here is the right comment! :-)
ReplyDeleteOh, what a great version of this story, Will! The dialogue is excellent; I really like how that brings the story to life so that we can get a sense of the characters' personality from what they say and how they say it - I esp. liked this line: "Fancy seeing you in a predicament such as this,” whispered the Mouse. ... the words of the mouse are bold, but he is just whispering. What a nice way to express all that ironic tension of the story in just one line!
I really enjoyed your story, Will. I liked the bits of back story you included that aren't part of the original fable, like where the mouse was going, what he did when he got there, and why the lion was stuck in a net. Most fables provide just enough detail for the story and its moral to make sense, but the details you added to your retelling make the story feel more fleshed out and helps the reader understand the characters' motivations. It was an enjoyable retelling of a well-known classic.
ReplyDeleteYour story was enjoyable. I liked seeing the mouse's backstory. Typically, an exposition or backstory of characters qualifies a story as good or dynamic. Often, I guess, for fables the characters are not as understandable or fleshed out. Thank you for adding those details! It made for a great story.
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